A Review of Personal Growth

I was lost for most of my adult life, almost as if I were existing.

I worked most of my life in well-paid jobs, but the sacrifice I had to make was putting up with ridiculously unfair management.

I have always been the minority throughout my career years. It’s never really had an impact on me because I saw it for what it was.

I am a person who shows zero tolerance for something that goes against my values and ethics. But lately, I have found that I must accept people as they are, with their good and bad habits, but I can choose who to be around.

People had described me as militant because I am never one to back down.

If a relationship or friendship comes with stress and that person is not willing to put in any effort to change, then I will not waste any more of my life.

We are all raised differently, and I have found that there are some people I choose not to hang around with, as they upset my equilibrium.

Life is hard when you find yourself fighting against things you won’t tolerate.

They say I suffer from OCD, but I don’t want to put a label on myself because I wash my hands a lot or that I bathe every day, because, as far as I am concerned, it should come naturally.

My tribe was taught to clean up after themselves. Look behind us.

We respected our parents and had some self-respect where it mattered most.

I take pride in myself and my appearance. I would never want to be the person who has any bad habits.

The only thing people could say about me is that I am not one to accept compliments easily, and I can be standoffish with people who show no respect for themselves or others.

People mention how programmed we are in this society. I know right from wrong, and I never associate with the wrong crowd; society does not dictate my choices.

The only sway that holds me is the need to comply with the laws of the land.

Common sense alone tells me when I need to break away from something detrimental to my well-being.

Although I don’t like to hurt or disappoint anybody, I must be true to myself.

Over the past few years, I have taken the time to rediscover myself and learn new techniques. I have become wiser with my choices, and I have developed a love for art, music and God.

Every day, I wake up and thank God for another day, and when I go to bed, I thank God for a great day.

Everything that goes on between morning and evening, I try to do what is right.

I have grown to love my family more than before, as I have let go of my past resentments and have started taking accountability for what has happened in my adulthood.

I don’t have any close friends, but several people are dear to me.

These people are kind, caring, and selfless, and they are always there for me whenever I need them.

When I am in a dark place, I tend to isolate myself from the world as I do not want to lay my burden on anyone. We are all going through something in life that we cannot understand.

My purpose in life is to serve those who need me most, and that is what I have been doing.

But now it is time for me to receive this gift.

Materialism is not what I am about, even though I love having the latest gadgets, and I get overexcited when I obtain them, but the joy does not last long.

I am more of a person who is content with what I have in life; money is helpful, but I need real love and true friendships.

Recently, I have met some new people who are very kind and respectful toward me.

But I still have that problem with intimacy that I will have to take time to work on.

People should grow together, not make hasty decisions which lead to their downfall.

In a couple of months, I will be 53, although I have accomplished a lot in my late forties, the best time of my life has been these past few years, where I surrendered everything to God and started living life my way and to the fullest.

I don’t listen to those negative voices in my head that say I’m not good enough.

My motto is ‘You Are Enough,’ and you can be even more if you continue to follow that righteous path.

No one can penetrate my mind with nonsense. I have the power to ignore people who add nothing beneficial to my life.

I have made many errors in my life and suffered the consequences.

But the beauty is that I have learnt from my mistakes and still have the chance to do right by myself.

No one knows me better than I know myself, and some may want to fantasise about my relationships with them, but they have got it all wrong.

I have never been in romantic love with anyone, and I don’t enjoy being in a relationship, as I find them stressful.

I have since learned not to live a lie, and after much reflection and practice, I can now overcome my fears of inadequacy and self-loathing.

My life begins now, and I am a different person from who I used to be three years ago.

I have more self-respect and have learnt that anything good takes time to develop, and to never settle for less.

In everything, there must be a balance.

Natalie M Bleau

Scripture of Balance