A True Friend Indeed

I’ve been struggling with depression over the past two months and have decided to take a break from attending fellowship meetings.

This week, I attended a recovery meeting.

Fresh off his holiday, my close friend extended an invitation for us to indulge in gourmet burgers and gelato. He could sense from my texts that I was in a bad place.

He had reached out to me multiple times during the month and had a feeling that I was going through a crisis.

I found the courage to share my emotions, and he helped me leave with a renewed sense of optimism.

Genuine friends are a precious find, as most individuals tend to prioritise their own needs above all else.

During my self-isolation, I preferred solitude and avoided conversations with others. 

Meanwhile, my family was enjoying a holiday 5000 miles away. 

Although I don't see them as frequently as I would like, their absence leaves me longing for their presence.

Depression has always been by my side, a loyal companion that brings with it perilous manic episodes that, if not controlled, can lead to fatal outcomes.

Numerous triggers usually set me off, but this time, I can’t seem to pinpoint why I’m feeling so down and isolated.

My friend asked me, "You’re always taking care of everyone else’s needs, but who takes care of yours?"

The only explanation I could come up with was that 'A higher power always protects me’.

Reflecting on it now, I realise he was spot on - I don’t show myself the same kindness that I show others. 

I feel incredibly blessed to have a friend like him. He is always so understanding, caring, and non-judgmental. I consider him to be like a little brother to me.

Having a support system of positive individuals in your life can make all the difference, especially during challenging times.

I tend to keep my struggles to myself, choosing to endure in silence and hope for relief through prayer rather than seeking assistance from others.

Specific individuals exude kindness, their positive energy shining brightly from within.

My Father, who passed away 8 years ago, was one of those kind-hearted people. This week, my family honoured his memory by laying his ashes to rest on the land where he was born in Bagatelle, Dominica.

As previously stated, I have not yet allowed myself to mourn his passing correctly. However, today, I am finally ready to embrace the grieving process.

As his ashes are finally returned to his homeland, I believe he has found true freedom.

Watching the live video of my family laying my Beloved Father’s ashes to rest was a challenging and emotional experience for me.

Eight years had passed, but I finally fulfilled the final promise I made to him.

After years of avoiding certain songs, I now dare to listen to them, even though they still tug at my heartstrings.

My Father’s influence has positively shaped my life, and I will continue to follow his example for as long as I live.

I have finally found the strength to mourn, and with that, a new chapter in my life has begun to unfold.

I sensed that he had been confined in that urn for an extended period, and it was time to return him to his birthplace.

Now, he can finally be one with the soil where he truly belongs.

Some may find it strange that I feel a connection to his ashes, believing his spirit is still with us. But to truly comprehend, one must recognise the deep, unconditional love and affection I had for him.

Even though a void remains in my heart and soul, I find solace in knowing that my father is content.

Every day, I find myself longing for his presence. I will continue to share stories and memories of him, for he is my everything, my inspiration, and my love for him remains.

My Father's wish has been fulfilled.

During difficult times, it becomes clear that the individuals who extend a helping hand are the ones who genuinely care about you.

Some individuals possess a keen intuition that can sense when something is amiss with you, even without having laid eyes on you.

I am thankful for these individuals who have touched my life, and I give thanks to God for bringing them into my world.

In everything, there must be a balance.

Natalie M Bleau

Scripture of Balance